full time angel

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Don’t be Afraid to be Hurt or You Would Never Move Forward

“He rings me every single day, sometimes more than three times a day. He tells me that he misses me and wants to see me.” she said to me with her big smile. Her eyes were bright like stars in the night sky. She inhaled quietly,”He’s a wonderful person. I owe him a lot, and he protects me as if I were his precious treasure. When he proposed me, I knew that I would spend the rest of my life with him, only with him. No other men.”

“He kisses my eyes to wake me up in the morning. He kisses my forehead and lips before he leaves home, then tells me to take care of the kids and myself. He reminds me that he will always be loyal to me. Sure, he does not always be faithful, but he places me on the top. He always prioritizes me. He always comes back to me no matter what he has done. He soothes my pain. He shows me that I can trust him no matter what. He’s my guardian angel, friend, lover and teacher at the same time. You know he’s 12 years older than me.” she continued her story.

“Often before he goes back home from office, he rings me telling that he will bring something special. He brings champagne, wine, honey, grapes, beer, or sweets and puts them on our bed, so we can have them before or after make love. Well…you’re grown already to know this. He always asks whether or not I have reached the peak. He wants to make me happy. He wipes me when I am sweating after making love. He whispers on my ears thanking me for a wonderful moment with me. He serves me drinks and sometimes he goes to kitchen and cook for me. You know he cooks well, don’t you pet? I love his cooking, even though it means I have lots stuff to clean up in the next morning. But I enjoy it. You know how messy it is when he leaves the kitchen, as if there has been a war,” she smiled.

“It happens until his last days. He tells me that he loves me, always. So no matter what others say, I know him better than them. I don’t want to remember his mistakes, I want to remember his love.” she continued her story.

“I think he knew he was about to die. He wants to make love with me. Sure I refused. I love him deeply, and I don’t want he has heart failure when I am riding him,” she said and we both laughed out loud.

“It would be horrible, and thank God it didn’t happen. I cannot imagine what to do if it happened.” I replied with my laughter.

Her eyes sparked brightly,”It’s always romantic to be with him. He kisses me passionately when I am angry with him, so I simply forget my anger and we make love. He treats me nicely since the first time we met until our last time to be together. That’s why I never think about finding someone else. I am happy with my man.”

I looked at her and asked,”Did you have any affairs?”. We have very close relationship, she knew that I wouldn’t judge no matter what her response is.

She simply smiled, “No. I never think I want it. I have him and it’s more than enough for me. He always tells me to preserve myself only for him. He reminds me that he trusts me without any doubts. Why should I challenge it? You haven’t met the one you want to live with yet, so you don’t know yet what it means to be trusted by someone you love.” she responded. “I never make love with anyone else. Only him. So for me, he’s the Adam in my life, the best one in my life, my world. He’s the best lover in the world. See, I have a point here. I don’t need to think about someone else when I make love with him, because he’s the ultimate lover for me. Poor you, no?” she teased me with her big grin.

“Well I don’t compare.” I responded her quickly and she stroked my head.

Her eyes stared at me,”When you were 8, he told me that you would have dark skin like his, and my smile. Apparently he’s right. He said that your sister has his face and my skin, so you should have his skin and my smile. You know I always be proud of you. Don’t be afraid to start a relationship with someone you care about. Marriage is a long journey. It’s a big commitment. Think about him and you as two identities who want to live together, not as one unity. Keep your identity, and let him does too. Respect each other, don’t see his wealth, ancestors and so on. Look at him as a person and follow your heart. Don’t be afraid to be hurt, or you would never move forward.”

“I love you ma…and I miss your man badly.” I sighed.
Deep down I thank God that I was born in this family.

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